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  • Brandon Parker

Your Washing Machine Is Killing You... Seriously

Do you own a washing machine? I have horrible news.


During your precious life you’ll spend almost a year doing laundry.


Lucky for you, I discovered a secret...


I’ll show you how to save 16 hours a month on laundry so you can get some of your free time back.




LET’S START HERE:


You’re doing laundry like someone from 1905!


You're probably thinking, "How else would I do it?"


Well, hear me out...


A small family washes clothes for 16 hours a month.

That’s 192 hours a year.

You’re a slave to a dirty job in your own home!


You're probably thinking, "But, I do other things while my clothes wash."


A University of California study found that after each interruption it takes you over 23 minutes to refocus. Plus, multitasking can drop your IQ by 10-points.


So your washing machine literally steals your time and makes you stupider...


Science says you can’t help it.


You’re completely distracted and unproductive while you’re doing laundry. Multi tasking is proven to be a myth.


Your Loss of time while doing laundry is STAGGERING.





Is Your Washing Machine Killing You?

Ha-ha. Maybe. In your life your washing machine will steal 5,088 hours of your time!

You will LOSE ALMOST A YEAR of your precious life doing laundry!!


Are we in the laundry Dark Ages?

You don’t forage for nuts. You don’t pick berries. You don’t grow potatoes. That would be a waste of time.


You just go to Johnny's or Wild Roots… or Red Pearl… or maybe Foster’s if you're feeling naughty.


Washing machines like yours were invented in 1905.


Why are you doing laundry like people from 1905?


I can free you from this slow death by washing machine.



A Brave New World. A commercial laundry service.

Imagine your crisply folded clothes, gift-wrapped in your hands.

Let me show you a VIP wash & fold service that’s faster, cleaner, and funner.

Your time is precious. Let's act like it.

Become a VIP Laundry Citizen.


Come by The Mat.

Drop off your laundry.

Get on with your day.


We’ll text you when your clothes are freshly folded.

This is how easy drop off laundry service should be.

Imagine placing perfectly folded clothes in their proper place.

No more washing. No more drying. No more folding.

Just clean clothes in your drawer. Yes, we hang clothes too.


Try our wash and fold laundry service at The Mat.


It’s only $1.95 per pound.


And it could save your life.



Brandon at The Mat


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